GREETINGS LOST SOULS. I HAVE COME TO GET YOU.
WHAT I AM PROPOSING TO YOU TODAY IS FOR YOU TO "TAKE STOCK" OF YOUR ETERNAL LIFE.
MY MISSION:
I WANT 10K/MO IN RETURN FOR SAVING YOUR ETERNAL FUCKING LIFE. THINK OF IT AS A "RETAINER FEE" FOR HIRING THE BEST LAWYER IN THE ENTIRE UNIVERSE. THAT'S RIGHT. THE ONLY ONE WHO FIGHTS FOR YOUR ETERNAL SOUL. IT IS "FREE" TO THOSE WHO CANNOT AFFORD MY RETAINER FEE. BUT FOR ALL YOU RICH BASTARDS, WHO HAVE "ACCIDENTALLY" PLEDGED YOUR ETERNAL LIFE TO SATAN, 10K/MO IS A PITTANCE FOR WHAT YOU REALLY OWE. OH AND TELL ALL YOUR RICH FRIENDS ABOUT ME. BECAUSE I WANT THEIR 10K/MO TOO.
REPENT NOW
I REALIZE THAT MOST OF YOU HAVE NOT "TAKEN STOCK" OF WHERE YOUR ETERNAL LIFE WILL BE SPENT.
DON'T YOU THINK THAT MIGHT BE
"KIND OF IMPORTANT"?
I WAS BORN A JEW WHO WAS RAISED TO SCORN JESUS AND EVERYTHING ASSOCIATED WITH HIM. UNTIL I STARTED WATCHING "NEAR DEATH EXPERIENCE" STORIES, OTHERWISE KNOWN AS "NDE'S". I HAVE TO SAY, THAT EVEN THOUGH I KNEW THE BIBLE, AND BEGAN TO KNOW JESUS, THESE TESTIMONIES CONVICTED ME AS TO THE TRUTH OF WHO JESUS REALLY IS. WHEN JESUS CAME TO THE EARTH, HE FLIPPED THE SCRIPT, AND CHANGED THE ENTIRE PARADIGM BY FULFILLING THE LAW. IN OTHER WORDS, HE PLAYED THE PERFECT GAME BECAUSE JESUS IS GOD IN THE FLESH. THERE IS ONLY ONE NAME THAT DEMONS FEAR IN SPIRITUAL WARFARE, AND THAT NAME IS JESUS CHRIST. WHEN GOD SENT HIS ONLY SON, HE SENT HIM TO BECOME AN AMBASSADOR ON HIS BEHALF. AS IT IS WRITTEN IN THE KJV BIBLE,
JESUS SAYS, “I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me." JOHN 14:6
